I am not sure exactly what to say. My Father in-law who I have known for 16 years was found in his home unconscious from a intentional insulin overdose. He was helicoptered to a hospital and was declared severely brain damaged. We took him off life support two days later. It has been one of the most horrible experiences I have ever gone through. A few months earlier my sister attempted suicide for the third time and was on a ventilator for a week. She has physically recovered but I am still traumatized by it all. With my father in-law I just don't quite know how to feel. I have suffered loss before but suicide is so different. It was not a peaceful passing. I don't know if this makes sense but I have so many feelings that I feel like my heart is going to explode out of my chest. I feel sadness, anger, guilt, relief, love, worry for where he is now... It is overwhelming. I was also voted by the family to be the executor of his estate and he had no Will. My life is totally consumed with unraveling his life. I have no reprieve from it. I don't want to burden my husband with my feelings because he is not taking it well. The last two days have been the worst so far. I am trying not to break down in front of my children. I can't sleep and my heart is pounding. I can't believe he did this to his children and his grandchildren. I wonder if anything could have been done for him. He must have been so tormented in life. I am just so sad.