Some Answers for those new to Suicide Loss - an article

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Some Answers for those new to Suicide Loss - an article

Postby psyquestor » Wed Apr 24, 2013 10:59 am

Some Answers for Those New to Suicide Loss
By Tony Salvatore


Losing someone that you love or someone whom you are very close to suicide
is the most devastating loss of all. Nothing in your life has prepared you
for it. No one is ever be ready for it. These are some brief answers to
some
of the questions that may be on your mind:

[*] Why did this happen? It happened because your loved one felt
psychological pain so severe and unbearable that they believed could only
be
stopped if
they died. The pain was caused by depression, which was caused by something
in their life and/or in their brain. Drinking or using drugs make things
much worst where they are present.

[*] Why didn't I know? Most don't know the symptoms of depression or the
warning signs of suicide. Many of those suffering depression hide it and
some
suicidal individuals don't show any signs of their risk or danger. Even
when
there is some concern it is very hard to accept that someone you know so
well is in mortal danger of suicide. Being life-affirming and non-suicidal
makes it hard to recognize the opposite states in others.

[*] Why didn't my loved one tell me? Some may find it hard to ask for help
or to admit to mental illness, even if it may be temporary. Some may feel
shame at being suicidal. Intense pain is distracting and consuming. It
makes
those suffering self-centered. It takes away the sense of control. It
doesn't
mean that they didn't care for or love those suffering because of the loss.
Tunnel vision is part of being suicidal.

[*] Why didn't somebody do something? Even professionals sometimes have a
hard time seeing that someone's suicidal. Misplaced concerns about privacy
and
confidentiality may deter warnings to others. There are no reliable
predictors of suicide.

[*] Why do I feel like I'm going crazy? You have suffered the greatest and
most horrible emotional shock of your life. Suicide is a severe traumatic
loss -- sudden, unexpected, and violent. You feel betrayed, out of control,
disoriented, and hurt. This is what happens after a suicide. Nobody's ever
ready for it, and it overwhelms anyone whom it directly affects.

[*] Why can't I get over this? The loss is too fresh and you are
traumatized. The first weeks and months are very hard and your emotions may
be
in
turmoil for a long time. You never really "get over" your loss, but you
eventually come to terms with it.

[*] Why doesn't anything help me? You can be helped. Start by seeing your
doctor. She or he may be able to recommend services or medications that may
help. You can go to a suicide loss support group or talk to a grief
specialist, counselor, or clergy person. You can find information and
people to
talk
to on-line. These may help you.

by: Tony Salvatore
Source URL: http://lifegard.tripod.com/questions.html
Tammy
Proud Army Mom
Moderator

I thought I would lay down and die after losing my Son to suicide.
Instead I chose to fight the monster that killed him.
http://www.afsp.org

Hold On, Pain Ends
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