Hi everyone. My name is Shanna. I was so incredibly grateful to find this group because even though I am reaching out for help in the forms of counseling and a grief group at my church, I have learned very quickly that even people who understand grief do not necessarily understand grief that comes from suicide. It is the most isolating thing I've ever experienced.
I lost my dad three weeks ago today, on March 17. He struggled with depression and prescription pill addiction for about the past 10 years but I never expected this to happen. I am his only daughter, but I do have three brothers that are grieving his loss as well.
I basically feel like I have a hole inside of me. I am getting to a point where I will be going about my day and not thinking about it. Then something will happen-a song will come on the radio, I'll see something he liked, maybe nothing at all will happen-and it hits me all over again that my Daddy is gone. The feeling is similar to taking a brick in the face. I was close to him. We used to talk for hours on the phone. I miss his voice, his laugh, his smile. I miss getting a text at 2 am asking me if I'm awake. I miss just knowing he was there. I don't know how a daughter ever gets over the feeling of abandonment knowing that her father chose to leave.
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The Suicide Grief Support Forum is a public message board, an outreach project of the Parents of Suicides (POS) and Friends and Families of Suicides (FFOS) Internet Communities. The forum officially began on October 2, 2002. Our mission is to provide information, support and comfort to anyone whose life has been touched by the suicide of another person. Connecting with others who have walked the same road can sometimes make a difference in how we survive a tragedy that may be incomprehensible. The board is monitored by special volunteers who give freely of their time in memory of the people they lost to suicide. We do not pretend to be professionals, and we encourage anyone whose needs are greater than can be met here to seek out professional help.
These links are for our other outreach sites. We encourage you to visit them. Parents of Suicide Internet Community Friends and Families of Suicides Community POS-FFOS Internet Community We Remember Them Memorial Wall Suicide Memorial Wall International Suicide Memorial Wall Faces of Suicide |
This is not a suicide or crisis hotline. Please contact a counselor, family member, friend, or emergency services if you are having suicidal thoughts. Visit www.samaritans.org or e-mail jo@samaritans.org or www.befrienders.org for international telephone numbers. Or in the USA, call: 1-800-SUICIDE 1-800-273-TALK1-800-784-2433 1-800-273-8255 For Deaf, Hard of Hearing, and People with Speech Disabilities who use a TTY, call 1-800-799-4TTY (4889) Links to Other International Resources |
I miss my Daddy
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I miss my Daddy
by ShannaCarver » Sat Apr 07, 2012 7:17 am
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Re: I miss my Daddy
by jillslay8 » Sat Apr 07, 2012 7:32 am
I am sorry for your loss, I wish I had some magic words to help, I just lost my brother on march 8th and I miss him also, I have the same brick in the face feeling, hope time will make it less painful?
Ken,I miss you so much it hurts. I hope you found what you wanted. All we found is pain.
- jillslay8
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