Turning 60

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Turning 60

Postby randosmom » Wed Aug 08, 2012 10:59 am

Next week is my birthday. Friends & family want to know what I want; what I want to do. They don't like my answers, but it's all I have wanted for almost 6 months & I don't see that changing.

They all say, you're doing so well. You're working & eating again, now we need to get you out socially. Really, REALLY! And do what? Have a great big party with cake, ice cream & balloons? Black balloons because I'm 60 & in mourning?

I will be at home.

Rando's Mom
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Turning 60

Postby randosmom » Wed Aug 08, 2012 11:00 am

Next week is my birthday. Friends & family want to know what I want; what I want to do. They don't like my answers, but it's all I have wanted for almost 6 months & I don't see that changing.

They all say, you're doing so well. You're working & eating again, now we need to get you out socially. Really, REALLY! And do what? Have a great big party with cake, ice cream & balloons? Black balloons because I'm 60 & in mourning?

I will be at home.

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Re: Turning 60

Postby Crystl » Wed Aug 08, 2012 3:35 pm

I hear you randosmom...my birthday is coming up soon and I want to crawl under a rock and hide..
my son was always there on my birthday no matter what..
I have another year before I make 60....

I like the black balloon idea but I'm sad for you!
I understand what you're saying ..(((hugs)))
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Re: Turning 60

Postby kansley » Wed Aug 08, 2012 10:07 pm

Four years ago on Aug 13th my son died....12 weeks later I turned 60. My sister's flew in to surprise me. They took me out to lunch and shopping. It was such a sweet gesture that I did all I could get thru the weekend without breaking down. I can not tell you much about that time. I did not want to do anything back then but do what I had to do and just get thru another day. I will be 64 this year and birthdays mean only one thing to me....I am one year closer to hearing Jesus call my name and going home. Nevertheless, I know I am here for a reason. I have a husband who needs me 24 hours a day, I have children and grandchildren who I love and who need to see that even in great loss and sorrow, God's grace is sufficient and I have extended family who watch this journey I am on to see my faith will with stand the storms of life. I understand how you feel and pray that you will find some peace in this time of unimaginable grief.
Jason's Mom....Kathie
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Re: Turning 60

Postby MotherofGabriel » Thu Aug 09, 2012 2:08 pm

Rando's Mom, crystl and kansley ((((HUGS))))
I know this feeling so well. In 2011, 9 days after my birthday, my son died. As usual, my daughter had taken me out to dinner and she got the waitstaff to come out and sing Happy Birthday, and there was a candle stuck to my cheesecake that I blew out. This year, my daughter took me out to dinner again but I told her no singing or candle. We had a nice dinner then came home.
As old as I am, 63, I used to look forward to my birthday. But, not anymore...someday, maybe? IDK
Connie
Until I see you in Heaven, my beautiful boy. I will always love you, Mom.
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Re: Turning 60

Postby Blossom » Thu Aug 09, 2012 4:21 pm

Birthdays are so hard. I really hope you are able to navigate the day ok and that some small blessings come your way. Peace to you today Randosmum. It's hard.
Blossom x

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Re: Turning 60

Postby cali » Sun Aug 12, 2012 11:07 am

I know Rando's Mom, people can't seem to accept or understand what we go through. They want to help you get back to "normal." They want to express their care for you. But you do what you need to do. Turn off your phone if you want to. If people decide they just have to come over and bring cards and gifts that you can't deal with (happened to me), perhaps you should take the day to go someplace calm and soothing where no one knows you, and just have a day being quiet. On this of all days you should not have to spend energy reasserting what you need.
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