JUST TO REMEMBER...HURTS

Share special memories of the person that you remember.

JUST TO REMEMBER...HURTS

Postby sulene » Sat Oct 22, 2011 2:58 pm

IT HURTS TO REMEMBER, BUT ITS THE ONLY THING I HAVE TO HOLD ON TO. HIS SMILE, THE LOOK IN HIS EYES...AND NOW I STARTED DREAMING OF HIM...ITS ALL SO CONFUSING. HE IS DEAD, BUT HE IS ALIVE. IN THIS PARTICULAR DREAM, IM IN THIS BARE, DUSTY PLACE...NO GREENERY IN SIGHT, TWO OLD FARMHOUSES IN THE DISTANCE, ME, SITTING ON THE GROUND, IN THE DUST...OVERWHELMED WITH GRIEF. AND IN THIS DREAM, I THINK TO MYSELF, '' I SHOULD PAINT THIS IMAGE''. MAYBE I SHOULD. ILL NEVER FORGET THIS IMAGE..IT SPEAKS OF LONELY FORLONE GRIEF. HE COULD ALWAYS GET ME TO LAUGH. THATS ALL HE WANTED, FOR ME TO BE HAPPY. I WONDER WHAT HE THINKS NOW....I CANT LET HIM GO. HE WAS TOO MUCH A PART OF WHO I AM. HE WAS PART OF MY BREATHING PROCESS, HE WAS PART OF THE CELLS IN MY BODY.HE WAS MY LIFEBLOOD. AND WHEN HE BLED OUT ON THAT BED....HE TOOK ME WITH HIM. IT DOESNT GET EASIER, I JUST WITHDRAW MORE...
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Re: JUST TO REMEMBER...HURTS

Postby sperkins19 » Sat Oct 22, 2011 6:29 pm

Sulene,
I'm so sorry for your loss. Remembering is hard and it does hurt. I know that, everytime I think of my best friend I start to cry or remembering a memory. I know in my heart he would want me to be sad or cry cause everytime I saw him he had a smile on his face and if I didn't have a smile he would do something silly to make me laugh or smile. But I can't smile it's been three months and I'm just starting to get my smile back. But the memories still hurt,but thats all any of have left is the memories and pictures and dreams. I have dreamt about my best friend a few times but no dreams I remember, I just wake up feeling like I just saw him. This site has helped me realize we aren't as alone as we think we are. I understand what your going through. It's hard I know, even if he was only my best friend days still are hard when I have the urge to call him or write him on facebook. My heart goes out to you *HUGS*
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Re: JUST TO REMEMBER...HURTS

Postby sulene » Tue Oct 25, 2011 10:24 am

thank u sperkins.. im wordless and speechless today again. but thank u.
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Re: JUST TO REMEMBER...HURTS

Postby tmsharpe » Mon Feb 06, 2012 11:37 pm

It does hurt to remember. Most days I don't even want to think about my mom. Her memories take me to a painful Place. I see her in my dreams ans she doesn't realize she is gone. I wake up wanting her to be holding me. I always considered myself someone who loved feeling memories, but now I wish I didn't have any of her...
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Re: JUST TO REMEMBER...HURTS

Postby Moun10dew » Sat Mar 30, 2013 8:07 am

I'm sorry for your loss. :( I can't imagine what you are going through when it comes to this. I'm going out of my way to keep my memory of my Kristin alive and I've been asking myself why....when I hear of others having my girlfriend in their dreams or feeling her presence am I not. I've looked in my dreams for symbols or anything that appears to be her. Nothing at all. I talk about her...I share memories of her. I'll even show my friends photos of her if asked.

I hope you can eventually find the peace you are looking for and can focus on the happy memories. I'm just starting my journey. Maybe one day Kristin will appear in my dreams. Right now all I have is time.
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