Getting worse not better

How does grief make you feel? Angy? Sad? Lonely? Afraid? Worried? Tired? Empty?

Getting worse not better

Postby wtch » Sat Jan 11, 2014 10:30 pm

Hi all. My father took his life on Dec 3, 2013, so I know I still have a long way to go. I suppose I just need to vent. Immediately after, my sister and I were so involved with trying to get his affairs in order, and make arrangements. Followed by Christmas which was spent cleaning out the house, and making arrangements for an estate sale and all that. I guess I haven't really had time to process anything. So now that the holidays are over, I find that I just can't sleep right. I lay awake with my brain going a million miles an hour, and seeing where it happened in my head over and over.
I have looked into and found a local support group that I plan to check out in the next couple weeks, but I just needed to vent as I said. I feel I should sit down and type out the whole story here on this site, just to get it off my chest. I probably will in the next few days. I don't think I've told it from the beginning to anyone. I feel like that may help.
My sister doesn't think a support group will be helpful to her and I respect that. She thinks that, because our father was 85 yrs old, that she won't be taken as seriously, because he was perhaps near the end of his life anyway. I disagree with her but that's another story for another day.
I believe I'm done rambling for tonight. I'm gonna do to bed and probably not sleep again.
Thanks for reading
wtch
Visitor
 
Posts: 4
Joined: Tue Jan 07, 2014 10:48 pm

Re: Getting worse not better

Postby psyquestor » Sun Jan 12, 2014 10:59 am

This is a good place to vent. We all understand some of what you and your sister are feeling. Someone early in my journey said "things will get worse, before they can get better." There is wisdom in that. Also know that it will get better, though it takes a very long time.

I hope that the support group helps. I agree with you that your father's age at the time of his suicide is secondary. It is no less tragic because he lived a long life. (((hugs)))
Tammy
Proud Army Mom
Moderator

I thought I would lay down and die after losing my Son to suicide.
Instead I chose to fight the monster that killed him.
http://www.afsp.org

Hold On, Pain Ends
User avatar
psyquestor
Supporting
 
Posts: 672
Joined: Fri Nov 05, 2010 11:09 am

Re: Getting worse not better

Postby wtch » Mon Jan 13, 2014 3:24 pm

Thank you. Now if I could just get a good nights sleep.
wtch
Visitor
 
Posts: 4
Joined: Tue Jan 07, 2014 10:48 pm

Re: Getting worse not better

Postby cali » Mon Jan 13, 2014 6:29 pm

I also agree that there is not an age limit on this. But I understand you sister feeling that way, as I have a friend who lost her father to suicide when he was in his eighties, and when she came to a meeting with me, she said she felt "like a fraud." No one else there thought that about her.
Sleeping can be very hard in the beginning. I took anti anxiety meds for quite a while to help me sleep. I am off them now, but they helped in the beginning. Rest when you can, take things a moment at a time, visit here as often as you like, and drink plenty of water. I'm sorry for the loss of your Dad.
peace.
cali
Supporting
 
Posts: 809
Joined: Sun Nov 07, 2010 5:14 pm


Return to Venting

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 1 guest

cron
This web site built and maintained by Rick Hellewell / CellarWeb.com -- Portions Copyright © by Rick Hellewell / CellarWeb.com, All Rights Reserved.